Wedding season is approaching, and many are already planning for upcoming ceremonies. With the costs associated with attending weddings, such as travel expenses, attire, and gift-giving, still on the rise, a debate has emerged online. The question being discussed is whether it is necessary to send a gift to the newlyweds if you are unable to attend the wedding. Various opinions have been shared on the “r/wedding” subreddit, with some users feeling that a gift is not required if you are not attending.

One user on the subreddit expressed the belief that if you are not attending the wedding, any monetary gift given would be considered a bonus rather than a necessity. Another user from the U.K. shared that the only gifts they received from non-attendees were from those living overseas. While many agree that sending a gift is a polite gesture, especially if one has the financial means to do so, others feel that it is not obligatory for those who are not able to attend the wedding. Bride-to-be “metsgirl289” mentioned that she does not expect gifts from those who are not coming to the event.

Etiquette expert Jacqueline Whitmore offered her perspective on the matter, stating that it is always considerate to send a gift even if you cannot attend the wedding. She emphasized that sending a gift shows love and friendship while honoring the couple’s special day. Whitmore suggested that if finances are a concern, sending a heartfelt card with best wishes could be a thoughtful alternative. When it comes to the amount spent on a gift, she recommended a range based on the relationship with the couple and personal budget.

According to Whitmore, a common approach is to consider spending $25-$50 for a wedding gift for a distant relative or acquaintance, $50-$150 for a friend or relative, and $100-$200 or more for a close friend or relative. She also advised sending the gift to the couple’s home before the wedding day or up to a month after the event. Additionally, Whitmore noted that if the couple is having a second or third wedding, they may request that guests do not bring gifts. Ultimately, the decision to send a gift to a wedding you cannot attend is a personal choice that varies based on individual circumstances and relationships.

In conclusion, while sending a gift to a wedding you are unable to attend is a kind gesture that is appreciated by many couples, it is not an absolute requirement. The decision to send a gift should be based on your relationship with the couple, financial considerations, and personal preferences. Whether you choose to send a gift or not, the most important thing is to convey your congratulations and well wishes to the newlyweds. Each person’s approach to wedding gift etiquette may differ, but ultimately, the intent behind the gesture is what truly matters.

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